I would like to think that I am
a good citizen. A follower of
rules.
Rules are for following.
Without rules, and those who dutifully follow
them we
would live in chaos, no?
When driving on the freeway I
keep to the right, except to pass,
of course if in such passing
I do not exceed
the speed limit. Although, driving a
Prius does
make it more of a challenge
to follow the ‘minimum’ speed limit,
usually 45.
I signal to turn and to change
lanes.
Well, NOW especially to change
lanes since
I was pulled over one Sunday morning in Kirkland for
NOT SIGNALLING
TO CHANGE LANES.
Guilty as charged. Yep. I
did it, or didn’t do it, as the
Kirkland Gestapo so righteously informed me.
I was the
only car on the planet that morning
(except for the Kirkland
Gestapo squad car)
and just, willy-nilly, out of my mind in my road borne
solitude just CHANGED LANES without signaling
(similar to if a tree falls in a
deserted forest does it make a noise?).
Damn! Did it! With wonton disregard to my fellow
citizens.
The Gestapo let me off with a
warning, but I do have to wear
a little yellow patch on my coat showing the
outline of a car not signaling.
So today I took the bus to the
baseball game. A good citizen.
I used public transit, kept one more car off
the freeway and furthered
the cause of bus ridership. The Redmond park and ride was full with
cars
of people who had jobs so I had to park on the street. I parked
on the street and dutifully followed
what the sign said.
The
sign said NO PARKING EAST OF HERE.
East of HERE.
I parked WEST of here.
I parked and got
out and stood at the sign and wondered
where was east of HERE?
I decided that HERE was meant to be where the
sign was.
Like where it was, was
somehow, HERE, or where I was standing.
And my car was WEST of HERE, not EAST.
Confident I had complied vith ze rhules,
I boarded the bus and went to
the game.
I got back and The REDMOND
Gestapo this time had impounded my Prius.
Towed the sucker away.
Went to
the police station.
Had to use the “red
phone’ in the lobby since the window was closed.
Yep. I
had somehow violated the rules and been towed.
So, there I was this morning,
paying a ransom to the greedy
evil toad crouched behind the desk at the towing
company in Totem Lake.
His assistant led
me back to where they had stashed my car,
dragging his knuckles down the greasy
corridor.
He didn’t smile. Nor did I.
He DID wish me a better day as I drove out of gasoline alley and
with
all my might I resisted telling him I wished that a swarm of
wasps make a nest
up his nose
and sting the sonofabitch until he crapped acid.
I expect I will get a ticket
from the Redmond Gestapo any day now.
I
have decided to contest this. If I don’t
succeed I plan to GET JESSE!!
Stay tuned for 27 - 8 x 10 color glossy pictures with
circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one…….
It’s ALWAYS something….
