Howdy, boys and girls! It's Peta Pete here again to say "whew, boy, what a rough time were having on the planet these days." Folks in the barnyard here have heard rumors about the humans up in Seattle mistreating us. Our brothers and sisters of the sea that is. Just what the fuck do you think of THAT, kids? We've heard that our brothers and sisters of the slimy variety (that's sea water and scale kind of slimy, not like my brother-in-law Mortimer - he's a fuckin' pig) that our brothers and sisters are being killed and actually tossed about with no regard to their dignity or last rites. What has the world come to?? Kids, you need to join me and all our friends here at the barnyard to help your parents and grownups STOP this despicable behaviour. (Ok, so I'm from the UK). Listen, we've got a web site so you can learn more about our quest. Just go to PETA and look for me, PETA Pete. Seriously, kids, this shit can get fucking out of hand if we can't stop it. What will it be next? People throwing steaks and (god forbid) bacon around at the restaurant?
Kids, it's bad enough that people are slaughtering your barnyard animal friends and eating them. Do they have to throw them in the air too? And what about those cute little airborne kittens Seattleites are throwing? Poor l'il fuckers! Jeezus H. fucking christ, c'mon kids and pitch in to help ol' PETA Pete in his crusade to stop this senseless, heinous activity now!
Just last week they took Kenny and Ralphie over to the 'dark place' with the big fence and pummeled them to death, bludgeoning them until they were dead. I don't know how long ol' PETA Pete has left kids, so act fast.
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